Not So Much of a Fairytale
by Aricia1
Summary: Once Ginny has realized that, looking sparsely at her life, you could call it a fairytale, she looks in more detail, and finds that not much of it was. It's still happy but not as perfect as a fairytale. Sisterfic and sequel to A Fairytale.
1. Hatred

**Not So Much of a Fairytale**

**Summary: **Once Ginny has realised that, looking sparsely at her life, you could call it a fairytale, she looks in more detail, and finds that not much of it was.

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Harry Potter. Let's just leave it at that.

**A/N:** This is the sister fic/sequel to 'A Fairytale'. You probably don't have to read 'A Fairytale' to understand this, but it does fit in with 'A Fairytale', so you can read them both if you want – the older Ginny parts in this follow on from the older Ginny parts in 'A Fairytale'. 'A Fairytale' has slightly more important, HP book related stuff, but this will have quite a lot as well. And, just so you know, just because it's not the Fairytale-esque bits doesn't mean that some of it won't be happy.

**Hatred**

14th February 1993

I hate Harry. I absolutely hate him. I can't believe that I was actually writing him a Valentine two days ago. I don't love him. I don't even like him. He's completely horrible. He's evil. He actually laughed at me. And he has Tom's diary!

I saw it. His bag broke, and I saw it. He has Tom's diary. That's why I couldn't get it back. He went into the toilets and took it! Stole it! And I really did think he was nice. I even called him cute – and divine! How could I have? He stole my diary. Actually stole it. He's more annoying and evil and irritating than all of my brothers put together. Much worse than them.

What if he writes in the diary? What if Tom writes back? Will he find out all my secrets – will he find out that I fancied him and thought I loved him? Might Tom tell him that I think I'm the one who attacked everyone? But Tom wouldn't do that to me. He's nice – he understands me. He wouldn't tell anyone my secrets, especially not Harry, when Harry was my big secret.

But- what might Harry write about me? Would he tell Tom that I cried today before Transfiguration? Will he tell him what he thinks of me – really thinks? Maybe he'll tell Tom that he fancies me. That would be so good. But I hate Harry. I don't care what he thinks. I only care that he doesn't discover Tom, or my secrets. Although he might already know that I fancied him. He might think that I still fancy him, when I don't whatsoever. After the cupid had read my horrible, embarrassing poem, Malfoy told me that he didn't think that Harry liked my poem. When Harry could hear. Malfoy basically told Harry that I had called him divine and that I wished he was mine. I don't. Malfoy's wrong.

But he's right that Harry didn't like it. Not that I care. First, he didn't want the Valentine and tried to run away, but his bag split. Without even getting his books, he tried to run away again until the cupid knocked him over and sat on him to keep him there. Second, he laughed at it. Laughed. At it – at me. But I don't care. I don't care about anything Harry does. I don't even care that Harry lost Gryffindor five points getting the diary away from Malfoy – stealing it again.

Then again, if Malfoy had written in it – discovered Tom – that would be worse. A Slytherin discovering a Gryffindor's secrets – discovering that the Gryffindor might be terrorising Hogwarts. Everyone would know everything about me in a day – less than. My secrets – and Malfoy would say whose secrets they were – would be known, and laughed at, for the next seven years. And everyone would think that I fancied Harry. They'd blame me for the attacks. They wouldn't get a chance to laugh at me – I'd be expelled tomorrow.

But Malfoy didn't get the diary – Harry did. So Harry will find out all my secrets and- he'll tell Ron! They're best friends. Harry must tell Ron everything. So if he finds out about anything to do with me, Ron will know as well. My older brother knowing all my secrets. That's worse than the whole school knowing – but not as bad as Fred and George knowing – at least they're not Harry's best friends. Unless Ron tells them once Harry's told him. Ron does get on quite well with them.

I was going to absolutely love today – it's Valentine's Day, and there were cupids – and I got a Valentine! It was a card, with a vase of flowers on the front, with hearts instead of petals which sometimes dropped off the flowers before growing back. There was no name in it – just an 'x' in the middle of the card. It was really sweet, and I really want to know who sent it. I can't work it out. It must have been a Gryffindor first year, because no one else knows me. I wish I knew… Tom would know – he'd work it out – he's clever like that.

But I can't talk to Tom. Only Harry can. All I've got to talk to is a blank piece of parchment. Horrible.

Ginny

17th April 1993

I've had a good idea – I think. I know who has the diary, and they're a Gryffindor, so I can just go to his dormitory and take it back – it's not stealing if it was mine first – is it? I don't want to steal it, but I can't think of anything else that I can possibly do to be able to talk to Tom again, and I need to talk to him. I miss him so much. Blank parchment can't calm me down anywhere near as well as he can. I need him.

Even though I know it's wrong, and two months ago I would never have stolen anything from Harry, I'm going to. I hate Harry now. I don't mind stealing from him anymore. I have to do it. I'm sorry that I'm going to, but I have to. I'll go insane without Tom to talk to for much longer.

Ginny

7th May 1993

I really wish that I hadn't just seen that – really, really wish. It was horrible. I mean – urgh. My brother kissing someone – _Percy_ kissing someone. It really wasn't nice. I wish I could forget the sight, but of course it's horrible, so I can't. I never can forget things that I don't like. Tom could make me forget – make me think about other things. I need him more than ever now.

Is this what I need to force me to go and get the diary? After all, I do need him now, even more than I did when I just missed him last week.

Harry'll be at Quidditch now, and his roommates will be around the common room, or eating dinner. His room must be free now. Do I dare go and get it? I don't know… I want to, but I don't want to at the same time… I think I'm going to have to get it – I need to get distracted from the picture in my head.

I'm going to go. I'm going – okay, I'm not, but I'm getting ready to go. I'm about to steal something. I don't want to, but I have to. I must – it's necessary. Okay, I'm going. I am this time. Now.

Ginny

22nd May 1993

No one suspects that I stole it – after all, I'm just an innocent little girl – who stole something. I can't say all this to Tom – I've spent a fortnight trying to work out how to put it politely – but I couldn't think of any way, so I went back to writing on blank, non-magical parchment. I stole something. I stole it on purpose, entirely selfishly. I wish I hadn't – that's why I can't say anything to Tom.

I've suddenly found a lot of things I can't tell Tom. I can't tell him that I'm getting doubts about him. I can't remember what I was doing during any of the attacks, and then I can remember everything – or at least I don't have any blank patches – when I'm not writing to him, and as soon as I start writing again, I get a blank patch and there are two attacks. I'm certain that it's me now, and I'm almost certain that Tom's doing it to me, but he's so nice and I want some proof before I stop talking to my only friend – I could be wrong.

And then I can't tell Tom that in the last couple of days, I've realised that I don't hate Harry. I can't tell him because he'd ask how I realised that, and I can't answer that to him. I wish I hadn't stolen the diary, and that's because I stole it from Harry. I wouldn't care if I'd stolen it from someone I didn't know, or from someone like my brothers who steal stuff from me, or someone I didn't like. But I wish I hadn't stolen the diary from Harry, meaning I must have stopped hating him and started liking him again.

I wish I had someone to talk to who isn't Tom – I'm starting to wish I had proper friends.

Ginny

_8__th__ September 2017_

_Al wrote again today, saying that James had embarrassed him 'more than he had ever had in his life' by shouting something down the Gryffindor table at lunch for the entire school to hear. Of course, Al was too embarrassed even to tell me what he had said, so I can't even write to James and tell him off for embarrassing Al._

_Lily, of course, was appalled on Al's behalf, and wondered quite quickly how James would embarrass her when she finally went to Hogwarts. I had to tell her that it was never that bad – generally, everyone else had forgotten within a week and only the person who got embarrassed could remember it for longer. Then, of course, she asked how I knew this and I had to tell her that I'd been in that situation before. So she asked how I was most embarrassed at school. _

_I couldn't tell her that the most embarrassing time was when Harry kissed me in front of every single Gryffindor (it was one of the best moments as well, but kissing in front of everyone - embarrassing), so I told her the close third – from my first year (my second wasn't embarrassing in the same way – it was only embarrassing to me because I'm the only one who knew the truth about it). The time I told her about was when I cried in Transfiguration after seeing Harry with Riddle's diary and the one I didn't tell her – when I was the only one who knew – was when I realised – after the Chamber – that if I had just thrown away the diary more thoroughly, __or not stolen it back, it would not have gone as badly wrong as that year did. I was really embarrassed about that when I realised, but of course no one else realised that I had been having doubts about the diary which, had I acted on those doubts, would have saved me. Lily seemed glad that that was the worst way that I had been embarrassed at school - she's stil lat the age when crying isn't very bad._

_Ginny_

**A/N:** As with 'A Fairytale', I've taken the dates from hp-lexicon

And, as always, please review.


	2. Others

**Not So Much of a Fairytale**

**A/N: **Very sorry that it took me so long to get this up. I wrote a large section then realised that it wasn't canon so I had to rewrite it. And I was away for a while and I just couldn't get on a computer – basically, sorry. Now for the actual story.

**Others**

26th December 1994

The Yule Ball was really good. I'm so glad I went with Neville – I was being so careful not to get my feet trodden on all the time that I didn't notice that I didn't know all the dances. Even after being annoyed last week that I wasn't going with Harry when Ron suggested it, I'm glad I didn't. I'd have had to dance in front of everyone and sit at the top table – and talk to Percy more because of it – and Harry wouldn't even notice me much – he certainly didn't take much notice of Parvati Patil.

What's weird is that when I noticed him staring at Chang, I didn't mind. I mean, I hated it last week when I realised he'd asked her, but I think that that was more shock than anything. Now, I don't really mind. Maybe it's because I went on a 'date' with Neville, or because I was talking to a guy who I like – I only just met him, but I do fancy him a bit. And we got on well. But, the point is, I think I'm actually over Harry. I haven't tried it yet, but I reckon I could go up to him and talk without blushing. I might even consider going out with someone else – and properly, not like yesterday with Neville – with someone I actually _like_ like.

But where could you actually go for a date? Yesterday would've been a great chance, but the next Yule Ball will be in five years time – and I won't be here – so that's not a good chance for a future date. There's Hogsmeade but that's only once or twice a term and – at the moment – I'd prefer to go with my friends and shop than go on a date. That only leaves Hogwarts, and that wouldn't be a great place for a date. There are lots of dark corners and unused classrooms but they're more for snogs than for dates… I can't think how it would work unless there's somewhere I haven't found yet, which is possible, I suppose.

I can't imagine going on a date quite yet – it's not that I think thirteen is too young, more that I have literally only just got over Harry – if I have at all – and it's just a bit too soon. Although if I was asked… it would depend on who asked. I think I'd be able to go out with someone – maybe – just not go on a date – there is a subtle difference. Going out means holding hands but not talking – like Rebecca and Colin were – and it doesn't have to mean anything. If you're going out on actual dates, that means more and I couldn't do that yet.

I wouldn't mind the dressing up nicely part of the date though – the worst thing about Hogwarts is that you're always trying to be casual and you never go out for a meal or anything like that so no one ever dresses up even though dressing up is fun – dressing up smartly to go out, not dressing up as characters like a ten year old.

That was the great thing about yesterday – it was a ball and everyone dressed up properly. I've never seen anyone else's dress robes and they were all so beautiful. (I felt out of place with second hand robes but I didn't look as bad as Ron with his frayed cuffs and old velvet.) I think Hermione changed most – sleek hair for once, make-up and pale blue robes that suited her perfectly – and she was obviously enjoying herself. I think that half the fun for her was the looks on everyone's faces when they saw her with Krum – some were fairly hilarious and Ron taking about 20 minutes to recognise her was priceless.

I almost wish I'd spent longer getting ready – I'd have enjoyed making heads turn like Hermione did – but being dressed in second hand robes, even if they are quite nice, isn't the best place to start. My robes were actually quite similar to Fleur Delacour's – the part Veela (I found that out last week), Beauxbatons' Champion – but hers were specially chosen – mine definitely weren't picked to work with my hair. I think I fixed the problem by putting my hair up and wearing jewellery but it certainly wasn't perfect. Oh well, at least heads weren't turning with disgust.

Ginny

6th September 1995

I've got a boyfriend! Michael asked me out today and I said yes. I got to know him so well and I wrote to him most over the holidays, and I guess I have considered the possibility that he liked me back – flicking through my diary, I've speculated a lot but I've never been certain – not until today anyway. He asked me after lunch and I obviously said yes.

Before we went to our next – separate – lessons, he kissed me. My first proper kiss. It wasn't a fairytale kiss where everything was perfect and I knew I wanted to be with him for ever – I could clearly hear Jenny giggling behind me and at the moment I can't imagine us being together for a long time but it's certainly nice to be going out with him now.

I wish we didn't have house tables – I'd have given so much to sit with Michael this evening but because he's a Ravenclaw I can't. And I don't have lessons with him so there's hardly anytime during the week that we can be together. At least tomorrow's Saturday and I don't have much homework so I can spend the day with him. It'll be perfect – and Jenny will be _nowhere_ near us to giggle.

Ginny

3rd August 1996

As much as I love going out with Dean, and as much as I'm not ashamed of it, I wish some people didn't know – namely, my brothers. Of course I enjoyed the look on Ron's face when I told him but after Fred and George told me they knew I had a boyfriend – or five, as they said – and they had a go at me for it, I wish I didn't have a family so interested in my life and a family with so many brothers – and older brothers at that.

Maybe I shouldn't have told them until the end of the holidays but then they'd wonder why I hadn't told them earlier and they wouldn't understand why I hadn't. Maybe this was the best thing to do despite the teasing I'm getting. Actually, I'm more worried about what Ron'll say – or do – to Dean when they see each other again next month. I don't think I will but I wouldn't mind seeing it, just so I could shout at Ron for once with a good reason to – if I don't have a good reason, someone always tells me not to shout – well, they tell me not to shout anyway but I can retort if I have a reason.

I didn't see Dean in Diagon Alley – I know we organised to go on the same day but I guess we were just unfortunate and didn't spot each other, and it's not as if we were trying to hang around and go slowly to see each other – it's just too dangerous at the moment.

I did have a good time there though – Fred and George's shop is _amazing_. It's got so much stuff in it – I can't believe they invented it all but they must have – I don't think anyone else could have thought of it. They've got everything from trick wands to love potions to Pygmy Puffs – I now have two trick wands, one Pygmy Puff called Arnold but still no love potions – Fred and George refused to sell me any (not that I want – or need – one), but they wouldn't even sell me things like 'Guaranteed Ten-Second Pimple Vanisher' which I now have a feeling Vanishes the pimples for ten seconds rather than in ten seconds – that's what must happen, seeing as Fred and George were the once to design it.

Ginny

21st April 1997

I broke up with Dean just now. I'm not really sure if I should have – it wasn't over much – but I guess that if it takes something so small, we're not exactly close enough to wait for something big to break up over. I'm sad of course – we've been together for ten months – longer than Michael and I – but I'm not distraught. I wouldn't exactly say that it's a relief though – just one less thing to think about when I plan my revision timetable. That sounds really cruel but I'm only thinking like that because, with O.W.L.s coming up, I can't help but think in facts and figures rather than in my own opinion. There's just no room for opinions when you're revising.

Dean and I started arguing because, when we were going through the portrait hole, he helped me – I know that helping the other doesn't sound like good grounds for a break-up but Dean just doesn't seem to realise that I can do things on my own. A couple of weeks ago he was asking if I wanted help with Quidditch – and I've been on the team longer than he has! Then he said something about football tactics which we could use on the team but how can a 2-D muggle game relate to a 3-D wizards sport?

Quidditch! I've just realised that we're still on the team together – that will be impossible. He didn't exactly take the break-up well – he gave me 'You're breaking up with me for _helping_ you?' And he got quite angry before storming off. I don't think we'll play well for a few weeks at least if we don't talk to each other – and I don't think that'll happen any time soon.

I need something to distract myself. I wish Fred and George were here – they can always cheer me up unless the joke's on me – but even that's a distraction. I want to go and find someone and play Exploding Snap or Chess but if I go into the common room then I might see Dean and that would be messy and just depress me. I think I'll go and find Rebecca or Jenny very quickly and get them to come up here. Not Heather though. I don't need comfort, just company and Heather wouldn't understand that.

Ginny

_9__th__ September 2017_

_Well, I've just had a huge surprise – not important, just one that I really wasn't expecting. I'd heard he'd got married and had children, but for Rose to make friends with his son… that I really wasn't expecting. Rose and Francis Corner making friends…who could have guessed? I guess us Weasley girls just like Corners. I can't stop laughing at it. Just as long as there isn't another Corner boy for Lily when she gets to Hogwarts. Rose and a Corner making friends is fine but Lily and one… that would be weird._

_I wonder what Harry would think if Lily – or Albus, which is possible now Rose knows Francis – got to know a Corner. I don't think he'd mind but if they got to know each other so well that we ended up meeting the Corners then it would be strange. I'm not sure if he'd mind exactly, just be surprised. He's not really the jealous type, although I don't think I am but if Cho Chang suddenly appeared in our life – or one of her children did – then I think I might mind a little. It would certainly be strange and I would probably watch Harry a bit even though I do trust him completely. I'd just be interested to know how he reacted. Or am I kidding myself and I'd be worried sick? I really don't know._

_I'd laugh to see Ron find out that his daughter is friends with the son of my ex-boyfriend. I've suddenly gone really childish – I guess thinking about my teenage years (and reading through my diary again) put me into that sort of mood. I'm chuckling – it can't be described any other way – every time I think about Rose and Francis. I think I'm just in a really childish mood today. I'd better not let Lily see me like this or she'll want to know why and then there will be even more stories which I don't want to tell at the moment. I really need to calm down before I do anything._

_Ginny_

**A/N:** As always, thank you for reading, reviewing or adding to favourites or alerts, and please, if you haven't already, do at least one. Pretty please?


	3. Separating

**Not So Much of a Fairytale**

**A/N: **I know it's been a while, but I've been away and then I've had 8 mock exams this week – I hope that explains it. I have now got a long weekend and nothing to do so, if I'm lucky, will be able to get another chapter up this weekend as well. If not, I swear it'll be up as soon as possible.

**Separating**

22nd June 1997

I'm sure it's not, but today feels like the worst day of my life. I've attended a funeral, had my heart break and endured one of mum's lectures. I think that last Wednesday was worse but that doesn't make today any better.

I couldn't stop crying at Professor Dumbledore's funeral. Apart from the fact that it was a funeral, some of the people there seemed more political than emotional and realizing that was shat made me cry first and, of course, once I'd started crying I couldn't stop. Bits of the funeral were perfect and 'Dumbledore-esque' – like the centaurs and the mermaids – but others didn't fit – I don't think the tomb suited him. It stood out too much, and was too obvious which I didn't think was right, but I think a lot of people liked it. I obviously never knew Dumbledore properly but it always seemed to me that Dumbledore didn't want to stand out much.

I listened to the speech – what I could hear of it anyway (for some reason they didn't magically enhance the noise) – and it seemed like too much again – too political and it seemed more like a speech for the media then the people there. After all, what does 'kindness to all' or 'magical excellence' mean to anyone? They're just words. I wouldn't know what it meant if he hadn't been obviously kind to me after the- during my first year. And 'magical excellence' – if I hadn't heard about last year – his duel with Voldemort – what would I know about it? I understand that you can't become Headmaster of Hogwarts for nothing but, since a lot of the mourners can't have known Dumbledore much better than I knew him – I reckon most were there because he had been their Headmaster, because he was famous or because they thought it was their duty – I don't think any part of the speech was particularly well written even if it did cover every single aspect of his personality which could possibly be covered. As I said, I'm sure it would fit perfectly into the _Daily Prophet_ but it wouldn't fit anywhere else.

I stopped crying at some point during the speech because it was just so wrong and unemotional – I'd run out of reasons to cry. In any case, by the time the funeral was over and Harry was- talking – to me, I couldn't cry, even if I wanted to.

I said I got my heart broken – Harry broke it. Straight after the first funeral I can remember going to. It wasn't the best timing and yet I still couldn't cry. As it was ending, Harry broke up with me. He had a perfectly good reason for it, and I understood it absolutely but that just makes it harder. Knowing he had a valid reason to break up with me when we both still like each other as much as we did at the beginning makes it absolutely impossible to blame and hate him which is exactly what I want to do right now. I love him. I really do. I properly love him even though I only realised it after he broke up with me. I love him and yet he's broken up with me. As he was walking away, after he had made me understand that it was necessary, I tried to hate him, realised that I couldn't and discovered that I love him. I think I've sort of loved him ever since I first saw him but I only realised it when he'd already broken up with me.

And, of course, because I understand – and because we're both now in completely different places (physically) – I can't ask him to change his mind, say I don't care, that I won't let You-Know-Who use me, that I just want to be with him because it's more comforting and better than anything. I nearly called out to him when he was walking away. I tried to but the words wouldn't come. As much as I wanted to, I couldn't stop him doing what I knew was right. I think if I'd managed to call out then he would have come back to comfort me and we would be back together because I could see him straining not to comfort me before he walked away and if I'd asked him to comfort me then he wouldn't be able to stop himself, but I didn't. We separated.

After he left, I just sat there, doing nothing until the stands were almost completely empty. I half noticed Ron and Hermione get up and go but I didn't see anyone else leave – I lost myself in my thought and then suddenly realised that no one was anywhere near me.

My friends must have gone of with their families and my family had probably gone off with Bill back to the Hospital Wing but I didn't want to. I wanted to be with Harry even though it was impossible. In the end I just went up to my dormitory. I managed to cry then, and I cried a lot. I cried, I screamed, I threw things and had my first temper tantrum for years.

It didn't help.

Dumbledore was still dead, Bill was still maimed, Fleur would still become part of our family and Harry and I were still broken up.

It didn't help one bit.

Eventually Mum came to find me crying into my pillow. She managed to comfort me enough to get me to come to lunch and I joined my friends for a while. They managed to get a bit of a smile out of me but I made sure I completely avoided Harry – I didn't really want to be put into an even worse mood.

We went on the Hogwarts Express – which seemed to take longer than usual – and then we got home. Mum changed as soon as we got home, shouting at Ron and me for taking part in the fight – we're not old enough, we don't know enough spells, I haven't even done my Defence O.W.L. (I actually did it the same day), and we could have died. We let her shout at us without arguing – I know she just wanted someone to shout at – otherwise she would have lectured us earlier – and I think Ron just didn't want the hassle of arguing with her – we all learnt a long time ago (from Fred and George) that arguing just makes her take longer to finish

I still haven't told anyone that Harry and I are broken up. I think Ron will either know or have guessed but no one else does and I don't feel like telling them. I'll just mope around the house until someone tells me to stop and then I'll mope around my room whenever I get the chance to. This is going to be a really bad holiday.

I've decided that this probably isn't the worst day ever but it's definitely not the best either.

Ginny

27th July 1997

Too much happened today. I can't process it all yet – although that might partly be the Fire Whisky which Mum, for once, didn't stop me drinking. It's not as nice as I expected it to be but it revived us all so it was useful even if I didn't like it.

I saw Harry again today. It was wonderful and horrible at the same time. Seeing him was wonderful but it was horrible seeing him react when we told him no one else was back.

At one point I suddenly felt him want to hold me, and I could not have stopped him – I would not have wanted to. I almost needed him to hold me so I could cling to someone. Mum was tending to George and Dad and Bill weren't back so I couldn't cling to them. I wanted to cling to someone, and Harry would have let me cling to him. I wish I had, but the moment I noticed Harry wanted to hold me, Dad and Fred got back and we couldn't. Not with so many people around (including two parents and older brothers).

Instead, we went outside together to watch for people. Even though the need to hold each other had gone by then and he no longer seemed to want to hold me, I took his hand and it made me feel better. No one noticed, and I guess we could have held each other more closely, but we weren't thinking like that – we were too worried.

As soon as Ron came back, we separated and didn't talk to each other again. We didn't share words of deepest affection, and we didn't get back together, however much I wanted it, and I don't think we will at all until he's finished doing whatever he needs to do without me. His leaving would be even worse if we were still together. I understood that when we broke up and I still understand that now. I just wish I'd fallen in love with someone without so many morals – someone who didn't need to save the wizarding world – but then I doubt that I would have fallen in love with them. Maybe it's my fate to wait, but whether it is or it isn't, I'll wait for him anyway. I won't be able to stop myself.

I don't want to put myself into a bad mood by explaining the rest of the evening, so I'll save that for tomorrow, if I write it at all. I'm never going to want to though, so maybe I just shouldn't.

Ginny

_10__th__ September 2007_

_These fairytales are starting to annoy me. I really should get Harry to put Lily to bed sometimes so that he can read her the stories instead before I just refuse to read one of them to her because they're getting so repetitive even though each night they're different. I wonder if Mum knew how much Lily would love the stories when she gave her them for Christmas – thinking about it, I'm sure she did even though I was the only daughter she had and I can't remember adoring fairytales quite as much as Lily does. Hopefully she'll give up on fairytales and start loving something else which she gets for her birthday – I may only have to endure two more days of fairytales!_

_The fairytales are just so completely unrealistic (although so are most of _The Tales of Beedle the Bard_). I know that I found parts of my life are like a fairytale but the rest of it isn't. The girl – me – hated the guy – Harry – at one point. We both went out with other people at different points. We split up through our own choice and not through the 'fairytale way' – being forced to split up, if there is any split. Then again, we did get back together. And whatever else I am, I am not a damsel in distress – I helped lead the rebellion against Voldemort. Then we had to wait to get married – I reckon most of the 'heroines' in fairytales are about sixteen yet their parents can't wait for them to get married. And Sirius… his story would never be told in a fairytale. Finally, we wouldn't have futures. We would just 'live happily ever after' which, as happy as it would be, would probably get a bit boring after a while._

_I reckon having a fairytale life wouldn't be all that brilliant, in the same way that Harry decided years ago that having the best wand in the world to use wouldn't be the best thing possible. It would be too incredible – using the old phrase 'if it's seems too good to be true then it probably is'. A fairytale life just couldn't last, but a life which, although it has bad bits, is generally good can and that's what we've got._

_Ginny_


	4. Rebel

**Not So Much of a Fairytale**

**A/N: **I don't have to apologise for the long wait this time so I'll just say enjoy.

**Rebel**

1st September 1997

I've never enjoyed the morning before getting to Hogwarts less. I was the only Weasley going for the first time since Charlie went; half of my friends weren't there because of the blood-status; and Snape was named Head. A great thing happened on the train journey though. We're starting the DA again! It's even more necessary now than it was two years ago – we've got a Death Eater teaching us Defence this year – I'm sure it'll be useful to learn offensive spells to use against them but we won't be taught about protecting ourselves or anyone else. The syllabus will probably be a bit better than Umbridge's but the teaching will be worse than ever.

Neville, Luna and I sat together on the train and started complaining about this year and about how we wanted to help but couldn't – Neville said he considered leaving school to help the Order until the law was passed forcing us all to go to school. And we were saying that we couldn't even join the DA now Harry was gone but then Luna suggested that we lead it. We didn't even consider it, we just started deciding everything. The train journey was so much better than the morning had been.

Every time we saw an old member we told them and they rejoined – all except for Zacharias Smith. Most of us still have our fake Galleons so we'll keep using those and Padma Patil said that she can make more if anyone needs them. Of course, a lot of people aren't here – they've either finished school or are on the run – so there are less of us – only thirteen but I hope that more people will want to join – I'm certain there will be more Gryffindors who want to join – we're the 'brave' ones. I'm hoping people's friends will come – Rebecca said she wants to and I'll encourage the rest of mine – and we might get even more than Harry had.

We're meeting in the Room of Requirement and we'll work out a battle plan then. I'll have to talk to Neville and Luna about it before suggesting it to everyone but I reckon we could try and steal Gryffindor's sword from Snape for Harry since it is, after all, rightfully his. I think we'll have to see what happens in lessons before we get any idea of what to do.

Hopefully everyone will be able to help a bit, whether by coming up with plans or carrying them out. We need to do as much as possible really. Fred and George would be useful but since they're not here we'll have to make do with the products they gave me before I left. There are certainly lots of possibilities.

Ginny

2nd September 1997

Today was half good, half bad. The day went badly at the beginning but it got better and then the meeting was amazing. I had Transfiguration first and we got a lecture about N.E.W.T.s. McGonagall seemed slightly more on edge and uptight than normal and it was just a boring lesson in general.

Then I had Muggle Studies which is compulsory – I wouldn't have taken it otherwise. Well, I might have taken it but only if Burbage was still teaching. It was horrible. Carrow can't teach but she can discipline. She caught Rebecca whispering and cursed her! I don't know what the curse was but she half collapsed in her chair and then she looked at something in front of her and screamed, terrified. She kept looking around the room at things which weren't there and screaming until, after about five minutes of teaching, Carrow removed the curse. Rebecca was white for the rest of the day and she barely talked at all. Muggle Studies isn't anything like it was – it couldn't be, since a Death Eater who detests Muggles is teaching it. Carrow basically told us that anything we'd learnt from Burbage was wrong and she asked us to tell us something we thought about Muggles and she either 'corrected' it or praised the person who said it, depending on the comment.

I had a free next but I was preoccupied with Rebecca who was shaking uncontrollably and so I didn't do much. Herbology was okay – basically the same as Transfiguration – and then I had Care of Magical Creatures which was fine. There are only five of us taking it, none are Slytherins and we have Hagrid teaching us so I think it'll be my favourite lesson this year.

The DA meeting was even better than Care of Magical Creatures. There were loads of people there – I think everyone who was an old member brought someone new. Every Sixth and Seventh Year Gryffindor came except for Rebecca and her sister and they would have if Rebecca hadn't been cursed. Every Sixth Year Ravenclaw came as well – they were the ones who saw Rebecca cursed. I can't even name everyone who came although I think we counted twenty-eight but there could have been more. Padma will have to make a lot of fake Galleons.

We started with a complaining session (we didn't plan to have one but it couldn't be helped and since the DA is about students doing things the teachers won't allow it makes sense to complain about them where they can't hear) – the other Carrow sounds as bad as the one I've had – and that eventually got round to what we will do. We decided we need to get better at non-verbal Shield Charms so that we can protect ourselves – and other people – without the Carrows knowing who's done it. We haven't got far but I think everyone ended up smiling at the random and generally ridiculous ideas we came up with – they'd never work but just talking about standing up to the Carrows put everyone in a better mood.

I didn't mention my idea about stealing the sword – I didn't get a chance to talk to Luna or Neville about it before hand and I've decided that maybe we shouldn't all know about it, if we do it at all – in this case it's not safety in numbers, but the less people who know, the better because the new school regime will probably include Veritaserum to get information out of people – Umbridge did it and I reckon this year will be like my fourth – full of educational decrees and cruel punishment.

Ginny

5th October 1997

We're going to do it tomorrow. We've got our plans set out, we've learnt Disillusionment Charms and can perform them and McGonagall has given us a valid reason to be in the office in case it all fails. I never expected McGonagall to help us this much when I asked her if she could teach me a Disillusionment Charm. I thought I would be good enough at acting for her to think I was being honest but I was no good. It's a good thing I trusted her though – it'll hopefully get us out of trouble if it all goes wrong.

I'm starting to think that we should have said something about this to the DA but everyone would have wanted to join in – and to know why we wanted the sword. I trust the DA not to give us away but I couldn't trust them with Harry's secrets – I haven't even told Neville and Luna what he said about someone else defeating You-Know-Who. I just hope the DA still trust us if they find out we didn't tell them.

Of course, I'm worried whether we'll actually get the sword without being caught. Being Cruciated is probably the least that would happen. I don't think they'd go quite as far as Avada Kedavra but there's a huge range of things which would probably happen if we are caught.

I need to stop writing all these things – I'm starting to wonder whether we should really do this and I can't back-out now, not when I was the one who suggested it, encouraged the others to do it (not that they needed much encouragement) and was responsible for a teacher knowing our plans. I can't say I'm really looking forward to it but it will be good to tell the DA all about it – and to get the sword for Harry.

Ginny

11th February 1998

We're celebrating Luna's birthday in style, even though she's not here. Firstly, Neville stood up to Carrow at breakfast and asked her whether she had any Muggle blood. I wasn't there but it was, apparently, hilarious until she cursed him – Sectumsempra, Crucio and the one she used on Rebecca on the first day. He seems to have survived it well – he's not as pale as Rebecca was and I think he's been Cruciated so often that it's not as bad as it used to be – we've all got used to it.

I think the Neville doing that and surviving encouraged everyone else to do things, even things we hadn't planned. We had the Quidditch match – we won – and Terry Boot charmed the microphone to say 'Dumbledore's Army still recruiting' every so often. McGonagall was with him and told Snape and the Carrows – truthfully – that Terry didn't say it and they couldn't blame him with McGonagall standing up for him so no one was punished for that.

Most of us were just causing general hassle for the Death Eaters so they didn't notice us setting off the Weasleys' Wizarding Wheezes' products – Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder, enhanced Shield Hats for everyone in detention and their fireworks – one form every DA member at exactly the same time at dinner and a lot more from the Slytherin table, put into the dishes in the kitchen when we used the Instant Darkness Powder. I think they must be at least second edition because I'm sure they're harder to destroy than the ones two years ago.

The fireworks each DA member had were specially designed for us and we each set one off which eventually formed into our Patronus shapes – Fred showed me how to at Christmas. For Luna, several fireworks from the Slytherin table became one hare, larger than the rest of the fireworks.

Tonight we're going to attack the castle more than ever. Hannah and Ernie and some of the Third and Fourth Years have made us lots of posters and we're going to use Permanent Sticking Charms to attach them everywhere. We're hoping to attach one to Peeves but we're not sure whether we'll be able to. I'm going with Rebecca, Susan and Daphne to release everyone in detention – we'll stun the Carrows if we have to. We've got a load of people doing other things as well – secretive and obvious – and, hopefully, tomorrow morning the Carrows are going to be so uncertain as to what we've done that they'll hardly dare to do anything.

The good thing about tomorrow being a Sunday is that they can't take their anger out on classes – Luna's birthday is even on the right day. The only problem is that she's not here and she won't know what we've done, but it's all – secretly – done in her name and for her. If today works, and it has done so far, we should all have high morale for several weeks which definitely helps. I just hope tonight goes as well as is planned.

Ginny

_11__th__ September 2017_

_I've been offered a new job. It's as boss of the Sports section of the _Prophet_. It'll be better pay but I'm not sure whether or not to take it. It would mean that I had to work even longer hours than I do now and I don't want to do that to Lily in her last year at home. If I was offered this job in a year then I would probably accept because there wouldn't be any children at home to think about. _

_I wouldn't get free tickets to the matches which are definitely a perk to my current job and I'm not sure how good I would be at being a boss. I guess I was sort of in charge of the DA in Sixth Year and I enjoyed it but being in charge of the DA and being a boss are quite different. The DA was voluntary and it wasn't being a boss as much as just organising it all. I think that if I was a boss I would find it hard to criticise people because I just don't like doing things like that. The DA was also a lot more fun than work is so enjoying leading the DA was almost certainly partly because I enjoyed being a member, regardless of my status 0 it just happened that I helped lead it – it was just as fun with Harry leading as it was with me leading so maybe being in the leadership position wasn't actually all that good. I can remember it putting pressure on me if it all went wrong and there would be even more pressure from a leadership place in the _Prophet

_Harry, of course, said that I should do what I want but when I don't know what I want it would be very useful for him to tell me what he thinks so that I can take that into account as well. The thing with that is that I want to do what is best for this family and if that means not taking the job then that's what I'll do. I'll have to think about it more but I think that I would prefer to stay as a plain old journalist rather than become a boss._

_Ginny_

**A/N:** Thanks for all reviews etc. and please, please review even if there's nothing good to say. I won't say I really want criticism but it is very useful.


	5. Waiting

**Not So Much of a Fairytale**

**Waiting**

12th September 1999

Mum has just told me that she is refusing to let us get married until I'm twenty-one. I'm not sure what Harry would say if I told him this but I'm almost glad she's told us to wait because I have only just turned eighteen and we haven't actually been together for ages and ages. Without Mum saying that, we might have got married very quickly and I don't think I want that. There's still the chance that we're not perfect for each other – I think we are but we haven't been together for much longer than I was with Dean or Michael so I do actually think forcing us to wait until we've been together for four years is a good idea. I'm sure I'll get annoyed during the three years because we have been forced to wait but at the moment I don't mind.

Ginny

17th September 2000

I hate being engaged to the Boy Who Lived. Being engaged to Harry is still fine but the Boy Who Lived gets annoying. He's never known career failure because he's famous and he defeated Voldemort. Even in his training he's doing brilliantly because he's already done most of it. He doesn't know how I'm feeling – not because I haven't told him but because he's never been in this situation.

A couple of other people came from Hogwarts to the Harpies in the last couple of weeks and, nice as it was to see Demelza again, having her being obviously better than me was very annoying – I'm sure it won't be long before she gets my place in the second team. Harry just doesn't understand because no one ever gets close to knocking him off the top spot. I guess the best thing to do is work as hard as possible and try to get onto the top spot – but I'm already working very hard so I don't know how I'm going to put more hours in.

I know I love doing my job and playing Quidditch constantly but I've never known how to get better and that, partly, makes it the worst job possible – putting more time in doesn't help as much as it does in paperwork jobs where they can see what they've done. The only way to know you're improving is to get promoted to the first team but the hardly ever happens. I guess I'll just have to hope that 'practice makes perfect' is true and more time practicing will make me better.

Ginny

28th January 2001

Ron and Hermione are married! It went by without a hitch – mainly because Hermione was the one who planned it – and it was all incredible. Ron looked as if he couldn't believe that it was happening and Hermione looked so happy. It reminded me of her at the Yule Ball because she'd taken time to get ready and her hair wasn't everywhere but also because she didn't look stressed or overworked and she was literally radiant.

It was great being a bridesmaid and it was really fun but it made me want to be the bride. It's so unfair that Mum made me wait until I'm twenty-one and yet Ron's only twenty and he's already married! Hermione is twenty-one already so she's made sure the girls are twenty-one, but surely if Mum's going to make any of her kids wait, she should make them all wait.

I have complained to Mum about it and she's told me that it's because they wanted a winter wedding – and it did snow yesterday so they got beautiful, snow covered landscapes in their photos, but it was sunny today – and if they'd had it next winter then it would have interfered with ours. I honestly can't see how though since they'd still be six months apart. Harry thinks the same thing but he won't admit it – once Ron had proposed, he didn't want anything to even possible allow Ron to back out, which I'm sure he would have done during one of his and Hermione's fights, knowing him.

It's strange how different Harry and I are compared to Ron and Hermione. They bicker and fight so often that I'm surprised they haven't killed each other yet – although there are lots of years for that to happen now that they've sworn to be together until death. Harry and I are much quieter although if we do have an argument it lasts much longer. I think they enjoy fighting and we don't. Maybe we prefer a simpler life.

But at the wedding, there were no fights between them although there were others – Muriel was complaining about Hermione and Mum just burst. I haven't seen her that angry since she shouted at Fred and George together about some joke product or other. She's been ready to burst ever since Hermione told her that she only needed to organize food because Hermione wanted to arrange everything her own way – I think she only gave up the food because she knew Mum would need something to do and she does do good food. She's becoming quite a specialist at wedding food – she's done Bill and Fleur's wedding and Percy and Penny's before now and she's doing Ron and Hermione's now. I think she'd be upset if I didn't have her for mine although I was expecting her to do it for me. If George or Charlie ever gets married I guess she'll cater for them as well – six different weddings. After that she could call herself a professional.

As I was saying, Ron and Hermione (as far as we know, anyway,) didn't bicker at all today which is quite a surprise since half of their relationship is built on their bickering. Maybe Hermione was too anxious – or too busy – to even think of starting a fight and Ron didn't believe it was happening and he sort of sleep-walked through today – he wasn't asleep, but he did have a glazed look about him, so they weren't really in the right mood for a fight.

Although I'm surprised they didn't, I'm also glad because who wants a wedding day to be remembered for the fight rather than the actual wedding, even if it would be quite fitting for them? Maybe bickering when he first asked her out was enough – I think Ron said that instead of saying 'yes', she told him he had taken long enough to ask her, then he defended himself and that got her worked up – I never asked whether she actually said yes.

Teddy was so sweet and he loved the wedding. He kept on grinning and pointing at things – he's used to the Burrow being much messier – and all the Weasleys being much messier. He didn't know what was happening but he could see it was a happy event and he went around hugging everyone and wanting to be picked up. He even got to dance with the bride – and put sticky fingers all over her dress. She didn't mind though – she didn't mind anything today. I don't even know if she noticed Victoire howling in the middle of their vows although Fleur did quieten her down very quickly.

Of course, there were little things which went wrong but it wasn't as if Death Eaters stormed the wedding so it was a pretty good – excellent, in fact – wedding. I'm sure that everyone enjoyed it (except Muriel, but she doesn't enjoy anything which involves Weasleys). Now that their wedding's over, the next one to plan is mine, even if it is still a year and a half away. We've got a date set – September 6th – but that's al so far (except Mum catering). I hope ours goes as well as Ron and Hermione's.

Ginny

16th May 2002

I shouldn't be happy. It all happened three years ago tonight. Fred died. Rebecca died. So did Colin and Lupin and Tonks. Voldemort died too so maybe it's worthwhile being happy but it feels like its hurt should overpower my happiness at being chosen as a first team Quidditch player.

I've waited so long for this and yet I don't feel right about it happening. I haven't told anyone about it – not even Harry. Maybe if we were already married and living together, seeing each other constantly, I might have told him but when he came to the Burrow we were all talking about the battle and noting else – I guess, since we all met together last Sunday anyway, no one expected there to be any news we hadn't already discussed.

Actually, I'm not even sure that if we were married I'd have told him freely but he would probably have noticed that I was happier than I normally am today. He always looks almost scared on the anniversaries of the battle as if he's afraid Voldemort will rise again. Maybe he's always slightly afraid that we'll suddenly blame him for it all and thinking about all the deaths makes his fears come to the front. Maybe he's just remembering how close he came to death so many times that night even though I don't think that that actually has anything to do with it. He's never been particularly afraid of death even if he hasn't wanted it.

I think I'd better get back to the 'celebration'. The day's meant to be for the defeat of Voldemort but it never has been – it's always been about people who died even though officially it's a celebration. It's quite badly named really – I don't know anyone who uses it as a celebration – but Kingsley won't change it – I don't know why.

Ginny

20th May 2002

I played for the first team today. We won but only just. The Arrows have an excellent Keeper and we only managed to score eight from about twenty-five shots. Luckily, Tess caught the Snitch quite early and we won by twenty points. I don't play quite as well with Jade and Melly but I was in such a good mood about playing for firsts that I wasn't on bad form so it worked quite well.

My family are all really impressed with me and George went so far as to tell me that I've turned out better than Charlie which, secretly, rather pleased me because he's the Quidditch star of the family – have I really taken that spot? Harry hardly noticed. He was their when I was describing the match but he didn't seem to realise that I was talking about Jade and Melly rather than Demelza and Georgie. I'm not sure if he even noticed that the match was on a Saturday and not a Sunday.

I understand that he's got all of his exams which will decide whether he does become an Auror in the next few weeks but, since he came to the Burrow for a break, he could have actually taken a break and listened to me. We're nowhere near splitting up but I do wish he'd spend more time with me and actually talking to me rather than, maybe unconsciously, ignoring me. I can't wait for his exams to finish so that we can finally start to plan the rest of our wedding – it's getting quite close now.

Ginny

_12__th__ September 2002_

_I turned down the _Daily Prophet _job. I decided that I just wasn't ready for something like that yet, at least not whilst Lily was at home still._

_Lily's been so excited today. She's looking forward to her birthday so much although she is slightly disappointed that her brothers won't be there – as much as she likes it without them, she still misses them. Lily's been bouncing around everywhere – probably because she just couldn't help herself. She keeps on asking me what her birthday presents are and when I tell her she'll prefer them if it's a surprise, she just tells me that she'd prefer not waiting. She's too cheeky for her own good at the moment. Considering she had hardly realised how close her birthday was yesterday, I suppose we got off lucky in that she wasn't this excited for about a week before like James for his seventh birthday._

_A day's wait isn't really anything for me now but I guess it's still such a long time for Lily. At least I got her to sleep without a fairytale tonight because she decided – on her own – that the sooner she went to sleep, the sooner she would wake up and it would be her birthday. That reminds me that I should go to sleep early tonight since Lily has, for the last three years, woken Harry and I up at between four and five in the morning so that she can open her presents – we've never had the heart to tell her that it really is too early, even if it is her birthday, and I sincerely doubt that we'll tell her that tomorrow so I need to be ready for a long day. At least she's not having her party until Saturday so her birthday and her party are separate, if only just._

_Ginny_

**A/N:** With the next chapter, I've been thinking about it for a long time and that might mean that I can write it almost without thinking and get it written quickly, or it may mean that I have to spend lots of time rewriting it to get it perfect – if I update quickly, it'll be the first, but it I update slowly, it's the latter and I'm sorry but it is for the good of the story. I've also never written tragedy before so I'm not sure how I'll go about it, so don't be surprised if I don't update for a while.


	6. Sirius

Not So Much of a Fairytale

**Not So Much of a Fairytale**

**A/N: **Well, it certainly took me a long time to update. I'll say sorry even though, most likely, any one who used to read this probably won't be reading it now because it's been so long. But, as an explanation, I un-obsessed myself with fan fiction because I had things on – I just suddenly lost interest – but now I have 6 weeks entirely free and I need something to do, so I've re-obsessed myself. Hopefully I'll be obsessed enough to get the last chapter of this out before I un-obsess myself again, and I should.

I should also say I have no experience with pregnancy or babies of any age, but I hope this is accurate (or ambiguous) enough to be okay. Well, on with the story.

**Sirius**

29th May 2004

I'm pregnant again! I'm not sure if I'll enjoy having 2 toddlers around constantly – one's hard enough – but I know I'll enjoy having another child. I'm fairly sure I'll have no career by the time I've had another pregnancy but I'll have a family and that's what's important.

Harry's really pleased, of course, but no one else knows yet. I'll go to St. Mungo's at least once before I tell them and who knows when we'll tell James. I don't know if he'd know what I mean – he won't understand pregnancy – but he might understand 'new baby'. He always looks as if he knows what we mean but I think it's highly likely that he's just excited to be talked to and he's not excited about what we're talking to him about. I don't know … I think James would be good with a younger sibling and he does enjoy being with his cousins – being with a sibling is only different in that it's more constant when it's in such a close knit family as ours.

I can just imagine James and his sibling together – James would be Angélique's age and with a new baby. He'd be so interested and yet still be really self-centered, making everything about himself, just like Angél makes everything about her at the moment.

I wasn't expecting this so I hadn't planned it out – I have now – but it will be brilliant. We'll have a Bill-and-Fleur sized family with two kids – maybe more – and James won't be an only child and everything will be perfect.

Ginny

3rd September 2004

I've been noticing that this pregnancy's a bit different to my first. Of course, since I don't have morning sickness – yet – this time some of the changes are good, but also … I don't know … there are some odd things. The Healers say everything's fine, but I'm not so sure. I've told them, but they say all pregnancies are different. The thing is Mum said all of hers felt almost identical. That scares me.

I wish I could put all of this down to hormones like Harry does – he laughs at me to keep my spirits up. I can't though. I'm scared that something will go wrong. I need to forget about my thoughts – they're probably making the pregnancy worse. No, because I'm not allowed negative thoughts, making the pregnancy not perfect because of my tension.

Need some better thoughts … er … names. I know it's early since the baby isn't due until February, but we have considered it. Lily Rebecca again if it's a girl – we still want our children named after 'those who died valiantly in battle', as Ron mocks our name choices. If it's a boy, we're not sure, but Sirius Fabian seems to be coming out on top. I don't know if it's too much of a tongue twister although I like it.

Ginny

9th November 2004

So much has happened. I can barely think. Normally, my head crowds with thoughts when I start writing but now I'm having to come up with each word separately. Thoughts aren't appearing. I'm lost.

Even Harry can't comfort me. He's been beside me for four days constantly. He's just not helping.

I got used to death five years ago – I even dealt (shortly) with Harry's death – but this. This is beyond that. I love my four-hour-old son more than Harry and as much as James.

Sirius. Dear Sirius. My new baby boy. But he's not here. He's gone. There was enough death in the war. Why does there have to be more?

Born on 5th November 2004, 10:27pm. Weight of 3lb, 2oz. Son of Harry James Potter and Ginevra Potter. Brother of James Gideon Potter. Relation of countless others. Name of Sirius Fabian Potter. Died on November 6th 2004, 3:05pm. Followed his namesakes into death.

What more is there to say?

Ginevra

12th November 2004

I hate what I've done to Harry and James. Today I saw James for the first time since it happened and it was heartbreaking. He wanted to see me last week but couldn't – wasn't allowed – for my sake. My son should be more important than me. He wasn't then and I can't change that. He thought he'd done something wrong, I'm sure. I did that to him. I hate myself for it. I barely thought of him last week. I never thought about James before Sirius last week. I thought it was meant to be easy to balance children. Mum could do it. I know I should have thought of James but that doesn't in any way make it right. I never asked to see him so I missed a week of his life: more than ten thousand precious minutes.

And then what goes and happens when I see him? Almost straight away he wants to see his little brother and I get tears in my eyes. I last a few moments before he says 'Sirius' and I cry and James thinks everything's his fault but I can't tell him it's not because all I can think of is my dead son and I find it impossible to give my living son any time. It doesn't make any sense and it's hurting James so badly. I wish I could be so much stronger.

Harry's coping. He can talk to James. I know I need to. I just can't.

Ginny

13th November 2004

George talked to me today. Not talking at me, or skirting around topics but forced me to listen to him and think about what happened – to Sirius and me.

I don't know if someone – Mum – told him to come and talk to me, or if he decided to, but I think it worked. He seemed to know exactly what I needed. He managed to say the right thing but it wasn't just that. He knew _how_ to say it as well. He talked more than I've ever heard him about Fred and then he said something about Harry – how he can bottle up grief. He let me work out what he meant.

And I know what he was trying to say. Harry's not really coping. I have to get stronger so I can comfort Harry. I suppose, really, George put Harry's despair into my hands, after waking me up enough to notice, and I realised I couldn't live with myself if I did that to him. But I need to get stronger myself before he'll even think of letting me comfort him.

Right now, though, I need to find James, talk to him and hug him. I need to show him I'm here.

Ginny

20th November 2004

That was perfect – or as perfect as it could be. We all needed it. Harry, James and I had a little – I suppose it was a funeral, but without the body. It was at home, in the sitting room, but we put all of his things together – a photo, his nametag, his blanket, and everything that a four-hour-old baby owns – and just talked about him. Well, Harry and I did. After he'd 'helped' to collect the items, James, thankfully, fell asleep, so we put him to bed whilst we talked about Sirius.

We managed to cry – the first time since the death for Harry. He had tears in his eyes at the birth and the next time he cried was the funeral. It's not perfect – how could it be? – but it was right. We needed it.

I'm glad George made me see sense. We really needed it. George curing out family problems – who would have guessed? Although he has been married a while, so maybe he's had some experience – although it wasn't _this_ experience thankfully. I wouldn't want any one to have this experience.

Losing a child – losing Sirius. I know too many people who have lost a child – mainly during the war, but some others as well. I wish I didn't. It's too horrible. But they managed to get through it well enough. So can I.

Goodbye, Sirius Fabian Potter

Your mother

_12__th__ September 2017_

_I was woken later than I expected this morning, but still not exactly late. It was five thirty by the time Lily woke us up, which is good for her birthdays, but … I'd still prefer it to be slightly later. She adored her presents, especially the book. I'll have to thank Hermione for it. She loved it so much that we barely heard from her again all day (until the birthday cake). I love seeing my children so happy. It makes me think that I did at least something right in the past fifteen years – or maybe just in the last ten years, considering the letters I got this morning._

_Albus wrote to tell us that he'd got on fine in his second week, but he'd already lost points for his house. He seemed so upset about it. I wrote back to tell him that James got a detention that quickly, and that everyone lost points from their house – as long as they gained points as well people didn't care too much. I hope I've reassured him. Meanwhile, I got an owl saying that James has already had four detentions (two for being out of the common room after hours, one for lack of holiday homework and one for hexing another student). I don't know where – who – James gets his disregard for rules from. I know Harry and I both broke enough rules at Hogwarts, but we did it for good reasons mainly – generally, people who didn't know how to run a school were teaching us whilst we were under threat from Voldemort. Thankfully Albus has much more of a conscience. Lily does too, but not quite as much. I think she'll enjoy seeing pranks played, but not actually take part in them … all similar to their namesakes, really. I wonder what Sirius would have been like … probably just like James if they are that similar to their namesakes._

_I can't help thinking of Sirius on any day which is important to any of my children. He should have been at all of the celebrations, and at all of the normal family life. I've got used to thinking like that. He should have been here, but he's not, and there's nothing I can do about it. I wish I could change it, but I can't. Oh well._

_Ginny_

**A/N:** I'm not even going to try and say when the final chapter will be up, but it will be the last. Hopefully it won't be as long as this one.

Finally, please review. I seem to remember that it made it much easier to write when there were reviews to fuel me.


	7. Future

**Not So Much of a Fairytale**

**A/N:** Well, this is the last one. Sorry for the slight delay but I've been away and I've been making the wedding cake for a wedding on Saturday and that takes up a surprising amount of time (even if most of that time is worrying rather than doing). With the names for other Weasley kids, those that weren't in the book (ie, only on the family tree) I've ignored, having previously decided in my own mind the kids that I think they had – sorry for anyone who wants it to be that much canon, I just can't keep up with all the info being given. On with the story (since I can't think of any other way to finish this note).

**Future**

6th August 2014

James is so excited. He got his Hogwarts letter today. To be honest, I'm nearly as excited – he's actually going to Hogwarts, and he'll be learning magic. I'm happy, and sad, and – stupidly – I've already started missing him. I don't quite know why, but I keep on feeling my heart squirm when he leaves the room.

I don't really want to be separated from James for 3½ months without seeing him at all, but I suppose it has to happen. There's only a tiny bit of me which wants him to refuse to go. And I've already been very annoyed at that part because I know it's necessary for him to go. Bill told me that it isn't too horrible, having a child going to boarding school, but I don't know how much I believe him. Penny says that she doesn't want Sam to go anymore than I want James to go (in that we don't want them to leave – we still want them to go to Hogwarts). I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling like this, and I suppose it's actually worse for Penny because she only has Sam – I'll still have Al and Lily around to be motherly to.

I wish James would calm down, but I suppose that that's impossible. I'm sure I was just as bad when I got my letter. Although, thinking about it, I wasn't, because Harry was there, and, of course, I wouldn't talk around Harry so I can't have shouted as much as James is shouting. And, I didn't have any younger siblings to brag to. James actually made Lily cry with his glee. I told him off, but not very well. I just hope he doesn't do it all summer.

I think we need to put off buying his school things – namely his wand – until as close to September as possible so that he doesn't experiment too much. I'm fairly sure James' experiments would be disastrous for everyone in this house.

We're celebrating tonight with a meal out. Teddy's coming too and we're partly celebrating his OWLs – the results came last week but we haven't had a chance to celebrate until now. 7 Os, 2 Es and 1 A is excellent so we decided to take him to one of the more expensive restaurants, although we were expecting results similar. Anyone who only knew his parents (and, I suppose, his godfather) wouldn't have expected the A in Defence, but that's just what he's like.

I wonder which James' best subjects will be … it'll depend on his wand, of course, but for himself … I suppose I'm thinking that he'll be excellent at everything and I don't want to consider what he might be good at.

I just can't wait for him to start learning magic (although I'm not looking forward to everything that he's going to do with magic).

Ginny

30th August 2014

We went to buy James' school things today. It seemed to make his leaving more real, somehow – buying him his robes (he looks so grown up and clever in them), and all his books (he's never going to read them, I'm sure) and, of course, his wand. It's 10½ inches, ash and has a dragon's heartstring. Apparently, it's good for transfiguration and is strong but difficult to aim. I don't know how good that combination is for James since he's never been overly careful and accurate. Maybe Hogwarts will change him. It certainly changed me.

Although, saying that, the diary didn't exactly slow down any change and it could easily have been the reason for me changing. Who knows? It's happened now, and I can't change that, as much as I wish I could. But I know it had to happen. Oh well, no use can come of considering it.

I was so excited to be going to Hogwarts, after spending all my life watching my brothers go – that wasn't fun. Then I started Hogwarts and I went from hating 1st September to adoring it – although I always wondered what was going to happen over the year – 2nd year was the only year nothing surprising happened, with the Chamber, the Triwizard, Voldemort's reign and then rebuilding the school. It did make school more interesting and, although Ron's school life was more unusual than mine I think I had more excitement and strange happenings than the rest of my brothers. Bill and Charlie's times at Hogwarts must have been really boring in comparison. But I still had a worse time at home whilst they were at Hogwarts. I hated it.

I wonder it Al and Lily will mind. I don't think it'll be too bad – they'll still have each other – but I don't think they'll especially love it either. Hopefully they'll go along as normal but they won't. It'll change regardless because James is gone. It'll be nice without his pranks, but without his grin and his chatter it'll be – well, horrible.

I can't stop it happening though. I'll get used to it and it'll be normal. I just wish it didn't have to be.

Ginny

1st September 2014

He's gone. Gone to Hogwarts. I already miss him, even though it's only been 3½ hours since the train left. I missed him at lunch even though we've had lunch without him hundreds of times. I feel silyl. There's no point feeling like this, but I just can't help it. I don't like him not being here but there's nothing I can do about it.

Ginny

1st September 2016

James is back at Hogwarts and things are getting back to normal. This is the last year James is going alone – Al will be old enough by next year. James should be with Sirius this year – he would have turned eleven last November if he had lived. I wish he was here – or rather, wish he was at Hogwarts – but I know he can't be. That's just how it is. I've got used to it – I've had to get used to it.

Ginny

31st August 2017

Al's going to Hogwarts tomorrow (and James is going back). He'll learn everything he needs – and some stuff he doesn't need. I know he'll enjoy it. He's quiet enough to spend time on work – unlike James – but he knows when to relax and do his own thing. He'll get on brilliantly – probably better than James since no one can help but like Al, a quality James has with people his own age, but not teachers. They (rightly) automatically distrust him.

Lily will hate it. She'll not only have two brothers at Hogwarts but she'll also not have any brothers at home. She'll get used to it, but I seem to remember it took me several weeks to get used to it. At least she's got her birthday to look forward to. That'll cheer her up.

I think Lily most wants a wand. Even if she can't use it, having a wand in her hand makes her part of her brothers' world. I know she's plying with Al's and I'm fairly sure James has been showing her magic throughout the holidays but I haven't been able to catch him doing magic. If I had, I would have taken his wand away from him. Unfortunately, I didn't think I could do that without a reason although Harry thought I should, since it would stop him breaking the law. Nothing's gone completely wrong this holiday, and I'm glad about that, even if I do have a child breaking the law behind my back.

I don't want these holidays to end even though they pretty much already have. It means Al will go, and I don't want that any more than I ever want James to go. But I can't stop it, so I won't try.

Ginny

_13__th__ September 2017_

_Lily's now read _The Tales_ all the way through twice, and has already decided on her favourite stories. She also told me that they were nothing like the fairytales she normally likes reading because there are morals behind them, but she likes them anyway, so I suppose I should be glad that they have morals. I have to say, although they're both different, I can see that the tales and the fairytales are similar in one way which really annoys me about that sort of story. They're 'happily ever after' endings, which, although nice for children, just isn't realistic. In fact, I'd prefer a story which ends with the characters having a future – a real future, with real highs and real lows._

_Then again, I suppose the endings are probably created. In one of the Harry Potter biographies – I read them so that I can laugh at them, not so that I can actually find anything out since most are idealised and unrealistic, some telling me that Harry didn't actually have lessons but learnt everything personally from Dumbledore – it actually ended 'and he now has a quiet life, with nothing worse than small household arguments'. That annoyed me because it resumed to know my life, but also, there was no mention of Sirius, no mention that 'quiet' can't happen in a house with 3 kids, nothing like that. The author didn't give him a future. Regardless of the fact that it's not as interesting as Harry's school life, I think it should still be mentioned. Conclude with the fact that we have 3 children, not with a lie. They do really annoy me._

_I know Lily doesn't believe the stories, and I'm glad about that (although the one she most easily dismisses as incorrect is actually the one that's probably most realistic – _The Three Brothers_. Although, I suppose it seems very unrealistic to her. It does have the dead coming back to life and an unbeatable wand, both of which she 'knows' can't be true. I don't think now's the time to correct her though. They know enough of why Harry's famous for the moment, and when they ask then we'll tell them more. They'll ask when they're interested enough._

_I think James will get there quite soon. I think Voldemort's on the syllabus for fourth year, so it makes sense that he asks Harry. That'll probably mean that all the children find out because James is going to ask them if they know what Harry did when he's heard the full story._

_I don't think Lily will know quite how incredible it is until she goes to Hogwarts. Once she starts learning about magic, she'll understand just how difficult and strange everything that her dad did was. Then again, once she starts learning about magic, she'll have other things to think about. Lily's got so much of an imagination that I think she'll do incredibly at Hogwarts. She'll understand things easily and I can actually imagine her designing new spells or potions … maybe I'm being a bit hopeful, but until she actually goes to Hogwarts and starts showing us what she can do, I can dream about what she'll do as much as I like._

_I imagined James would be a new Fred and George, and he pretty much is, and I thought Albus would be clever and popular and so far he is (although I will admit that there hasn't been much time to find out). So maybe Lily will use her imagination to do the things I think she could. As long as they do something with their talents when they get out of school, I'm sure they'll be fine. They'll all be good enough to get through life without just being 'Harry Potter's kid'. They'll make their own future and, cliché as it is, I suppose I do hope they'll live 'happily ever after', but with a more interesting life than that suggests._

_Ginny_

**A/N:** Well, there you go. I've finally finished this fic and I'm glad I have because I don't like to do things and then not finish them. I'm really thankful to everyone who's stayed with this fic, either from the start or from just a couple of chapters ago. And to everyone who either goes on to read A Fairytale, or read this because of first reading A Fairytale. (For those of you unsure whether to go onto A Fairytale, I can tell you honestly that it is definitely better than this fic.)

I want to say a special thanks to keaneplay because I don't think that I would have finished this fic without you. It really helps to know that at least one person is reading it.

Thank you to all reviewers, Story Alerters, Favouriters and other readers.

Finally, please review this for a last (possibly first as well, depending on who you are) time, and feel free to look at my other fics, most of which are completely different to this.


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